It feels different this time

The first two years, we flew out together, enjoyed a vacation, drove Katie up to Flagstaff and helped her move into McConnell Hall, then Mountain View on opening day. 

I didn't mind coming home to an "emptynester" house. We had done our duty - deposited her safely at school, where she was meant to be for the next nine months. There was closure. I saw the space she would live in, the roommate who would come and go, but be there through the long, dark night. I sensed the excitement of a new school year, felt autumn in the year and accepted the waning days of summer. 

It was time to say goodbye. 

This year, she flew off on her own more almost three weeks early, abruptly taking summer with her before I was ready. There was more shopping to do, meals to cook, talks to have. There will always be more to do and not enough days. And for that reason I am blessed. Better to have more time left on the clock, than use it all up.

It feels different this time - her leaving. The homecomings will continue, but the stays may become shorter in time and with time.